Wednesday, May 25, 2005

It's almost time...

I know there is no point to concentrate now...I've been trying to force myself to sit down and actually read something about the research work I am going to do, but it's not really effective. I want to read something, I want to know more, but somehow the time just flies by , and I'm not even sure what I've done. Everyday I seem to wake up, go to work, and do some little chores, before you know it, i't's time to have Indonesian lessons with a friend. Then it's home time, then dinner, a bit of tv, and it's almost already time for bed! Before you know it, sitting around, surfing the net, listening to music, drinking some warm water, it's already 1am, like now!

(Today we did have a change, and we ate 'firepot': a boiling pot of soup, and you put vegetables, meat, noodles in it, and cook together with others. Quite filling, fun, and something typically done with friends and family.)

Last night I dreamt about laws and legislative theory in my sleep actually. Maybe that's because I was so anxious about reading more and more about the topic, that I actually dreamt it happening. Don't know if it's a good sign, at all. I just hope that I will be 'prepared' for what is to come ahead of me. I feel a bit puzzled whether I should be digging myself in books and articles and thirst knowledge, so I'd be better prepared for dealing, analysing and writing about migrant workers....but then a part of me wants to enjoy the last few days here for a long time to come, to go out with friends, to finish unfinished business (laatste loodjes). A part of me also says that it may be alright to face what is to come with a clear, relaxed mind, and to absorb the practical side, before the academic and heavy stuff. A part of me says I am not a PhD student, this is not a thesis-to-be, just experience, just an exploratory fieldwork, which should be filled with fun and relaxation as well as some work.

Still, sometimes a bit uneasy.

Bags and suitcase are packed.
Not sure what else I could prepare for.

Except, for bed now.

No comments: